Expectations: After 20 years, the list of criteria for a future partner is growing exponentially. Just beautiful eyes are no longer enough – they must always be brown and placed on a pleasant face with brutal stubble, or at least without a miserable antenna. Middle-level workers, divorced, very boring, not generous enough – pass by, please do not block the road to the man of my dreams.
Rumor has it that after 35 plank starts to plummet. Maybe it’s fiction women who failed to marry and jealous free friends. I can say one thing: if you continue to treat finding a partner as a personnel officer with 20 years of experience, you will have all the chances to check how the treatment of men with age.
Expectations from a relationship grow gradually. If you have already flashed the thought that normal men left, it might be your unrealistic demands and not the degeneration of humanity. Here are a few signs that will help you understand what you’re asking too much from a relationship.
1. Judge partner’s past relationship
Don’t let the history of past relations guy affect your opinion about it. Of course, if we are talking about important things like the betrayal to former partners, be wary. But when a man does not meet your expectations due to a certain number of past novels or a bad marriage, you may be too strict. In the closet for your personal life certainly was overlooked a couple of nasty stories, but they do not necessarily characterize you?
Even if you can compete in virtue with the Greek Athena, so what? Every relationship is a unique experience, and with each new partner, the person behaves differently.
2. Looking for a relationship without problems
To meet a guy, marry him and never experience pain, not worry about quarrels and discomfort in the relationship. Sounds great, but that’s life, baby, not a muffin with frosting.
If you are looking for a partner who will solve all your problems, you’ll never find him. Conflicts, problems and misunderstandings in a relationship are going to benefit when they are resolved constructively. Don’t expect somewhere there is a person with whom everything will be perfect.
3. Looking for certain physical characteristics
If you think you know exactly what to look for in your mate, then do not choose the healthy way to find a partner. Your expectations of the guy are not realistic when you think about it, how about a set of certain physical traits.
It is one thing to feel attraction to someone- the lack of chemistry is hard to compensate for other advantages of the partner. But if you automatically exclude a man based only on external data, it is not a good sign.
Next time you decide to say no to a guy because he doesn’t fit your type, try to give him a chance and get to know the person.
4. Push people away that you like
The guy is good, but you’re not going to meet with the cashier from the supermarket. He’s funny, but in 25 years of travel by public transport – it’s just not right. You could be a great relationship, sorry he did not live up to your requirements.
I don’t mind the pragmatic approach, but for a long-term relationship, sincere attraction to the partner is much more. If you constantly get rid of people that you really like, is the surest sign that your expectations are too high.
5. Do not forgive mistakes
High expectations not only in the way to find a partner, but also spoil the already established relations. The ability to forgive is one of the keys together. Whatever demanding you weren’t people accept the fact that everyone is wrong. Categorical attitude will not help you find the best and will only lead to chronic disappointment.
6. Giving up a guy after a first date
If the first date you’re not really impressed, you should give the guy another chance. While exploring all feel ridiculous, nervous, worried, fall into an awkward situation. In such circumstances, it is difficult to get to know each other, and especially to feel something.
7. Expect that the partner will behave in a certain way
One of the main inconveniences in dealing with people – they are not you. This can explain the majority of conflicts and problems with society in General and partner in particular.
We can’t expect people to share all of our beliefs and had a similar outlook on life. Your boyfriend, if he is a person, not a Chinese sex robot, will never behave completely as you wish.
Embrace the fact that there are no second halves, there are whole people with their opinions and interests. You have to consider if you want to be happy in a relationship.