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Take time out: the basic rules of a break in a relationship


Sometimes last chance to save the relationship is to break up for a while. The pause can end in the permanent alienation or transfer you to the next level of trust and understanding. It all depends on how the partners will negotiate the terms of the timeout. Here are the basic rules of the break in relations. They will help you to understand yourself and make the right decision.


Find out why you need a break

Conducted a self-examination to understand what you want to relax. I feel that the relationship lacks passion? Life came to a new phase – moving the other work — you’re not sure are ready to go further with this guy? It is important to give the report, you solve your problem. If he is totally against kids, and you dream of motherhood, there is no need to break – it’s time to leave.

Don’t take a break just to postpone the rupture, and to spare the feelings of your partner. Decided to take a break, do it for yourself, not for him. If you feel that you loaded, confused and unable to think properly, maybe you really need time to assess the situation.

Discuss the break personally

Since the gap for you two to discuss it better in person. Messaging or phone conversation bothering to read non-verbal signals. Face to face, it’ll be easier to catch his reaction and to make sure that you understand each other.

break in person

Discuss the conditions of the gap

Be very clear and honest. Tell us why you need a break. Agree, stay in touch, or completely eliminate communication. And most importantly – will you chat with other guys and girls in this period is loyalty an important condition.

Another serious point worth discussing is how to treat a break if you live together. Shared things or a pet will prevent a truly rest from relationships. Try to eliminate all interdependencies at the time of the timeout. The more complete the gap, the easier it is for you to disengage from the situation and free yourself from its influence.

Do not set the final terms

This may be difficult, it’s not clear how long it will last breakup and when it becomes final. But you don’t know in advance how soon will understand their feelings and what difficulties they will face. Temporary restrictions will only lead to disappointment. The guy will blame you that you are not yet ready to make a decision. You will begin to feel the pressure and the blame for its own uncertainty.

The only thing is to agree — each of you will let me know if something changes. You’re gonna say when you make the final decision. It is when you realize that you are not ready to wait anymore and wants to leave.


Use the break time to get to know yourself

Do all the things you missed when you were paired. Spend more time with family and friends, find a new hobby. Just be alone, because the relationship is not always possible.

There is a difference to feel uncomfortable without a specific person or just a couple. A break is a good time to feel it. Ask yourself whether the fear of being alone a compelling reason to be with someone.

If a break was like a breath of freedom, it’s time to think about whether to be paired with someone. Once you’re happier alone than with a guy – it’s time for a break.

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Written by Hannah

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